So, Randi started working at HT this week, and it is the best job EVAR. There's usually next to nothing to do workwise, which makes it super laid back. And it's nice when there are customers, because you can completely focus on them and make them want to tell their friends how cool you were so they'll come back with more people and more money. After working there for only three days so far, I have one more day to go this week, I'm looking forward to this. 

You people who live here should come visit me some time! Most of the days I work, I work from 9-5 or 5:30, and I close one night a week. That'll be my normal schedule. That leaves me three days off to do whatever (which probably translates to me getting another part-time job to fill in the gaps and pad the wallet a touch more.)

I think what I'll have to do is print out some of the story fragments I've been working on on my writing LJ and take a notebook with me to keep me occupied once I've already straightened and arranged everything by size more than two times even though there haven't been any new customers. But, Halloween's just around the corner, so business will likely pick up some soon once we get that Halloween plan-o-gram up. I think that's happening some time next week. o.O

Anywho, hope everyone's surviving, and now I have to run off and fudge a ton of posts for my writing LJ since I'm SIX effin' days behind. Dial-up internet= teh suck.

<3!!!
~Ran-Ran

Only two days left at the hotel! w00t! After I go home this morning, that is.

Then I get to sit at home all by myself all damned day because Mom and Dad are going to go stay at Singer Castle for the night to celebrate their 22 wedding anniversary. But oh well, it's for a good cause. And maybe I'll finally get some time to do some sketching, seeing as how I slept until fucking 6 pm last night... No way in hell will I be ready for bed when I get home this morning...

So, I finally heard back from Hot Topic today, and I have the job!!!!! *does some happiness dance or other* Since I'm being nice and giving my two weeks notice here tomorrow, that means my first day at HT will be September 29th. 
And also, after doing a little light sketching yesterday, I've discovered that I'm not quite so rotten at drawing as I had imagined I was. YAY!
So, tonight's gonna be a light night at work, and I hope to get caught up on my stupid writing LJ. I think I'll write one long piece and break it into chunks and post it that way... That might work...

Anywho, guess that's it for now. 

<3!!!
~Ran-Ran

So... Dustin and I fought all day for like the thirtieth day in a row. Hell, we actually broke up for a few hours last week. The worse things get, the more I start to wonder if I shouldn't have gone back to him. He always calls me back and for a few minutes, he's the sweet guy I feel so hard for. But now... he's always tired from work and an all-around bastard about everything. It's like... he wonders why I'm never happy and never smile anymore, and I try to explain it to him, but he just doesn't get it. I suppose the best way to describe it is this...

Every day, I'm happy on the way there. I'm always excited to see him, because I love the kid more than I can accurately describe with words. But then I get there and he's either got a cigarette dangling from his mouth (which is so fucking disgusting...) or he's looking pissed or sad. I'd try to make him feel better, but that always seems to make him more upset, so I tend to ignore it and act like everything's normal. So then, he'll get going on about something or other that makes me feel like shit, and then once I'm thoroughly depressed, all of a sudden he's bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and wondering why I'm so down. I'm just so fucking tired that I don't even bother to explain it to him anymore... So, does that mean that he's not happy unless I'm miserable? If so, this is a shitty way to have to spend the rest of your life...

It seems like I cry all the time for no reason now, like today. Dustin asked me why I was crying and all I could tell him was "I don't know". If I wasn't a pill-hater, I'd probably say that the severity of my depression requires medication. However, knowing that taking anti-depressants can increase thoughts of suicide, and knowing that my brain's already there as it is, I know that would be a bad plan anyway.

Another thing that bugs me about DJ is that he never wants to do anything but sit around and watch TV or play motherfucking Runescape on the internet. You all know me... I'm an outdoorsy person to the core. Not being able to go outside all summer because of my job and his unwillingness to do anything other than vegetate is literally killing me. I'm like a plant... I need sunshine and fresh air or I wither and eventually die. Hell, if I wasn't afraid of fucking it up (because with how terrible I am at everything, there's no way I could even kill myself properly) I'd probably go bite a bullet right now. 

I'm just so fucking lonely, and I feel like I'm alone all the time, even when I'm with him... I just don't know what to do anymore... I don't know much of anything anymore...

P.S.- the "how appropriate" thing goes with what's playing on the radio. If you know the song, you know what I mean...

So... as if Salem dying off the other day wasn't fucking bad enough...

Smokey, our resident 17 year old cat, is in such a sorry state that she has maggots growing inside of her and flies coming from her... Well, I'm sure you can figure it out. It's gotten so bad that there isn't anything we can do for her, and she's hurting so much... Dad's probably gonna have her put down on Monday. And so, I'm gonna try to avoid going home until after it's happened. I said goodbye to her before I headed to work tonight, so... I just don't want her to hurt anymore.

In other news, still haven't heard anything from Hot Topic, but I hope to be hearing from them (one way or the other) in the next few days. I'd love to get that job and get back on a normal sleeping schedule. 2-3 hours a night (if that) just doesn't cut it like it used to.

Hugs, everyone.
~Ran-Ran

So, I have my phone interview with the district manager from Hot Topic tomorrow morning  at 11 a.m. Hopefully I'll be coherent since that means I can't go to sleep after work tonight until he calls me. :( But, in brighter news, Kelly says I pretty much have the job unless I majorly fuck up the interview, which is impossible. I can sell anything to anyone, including me as a good employee. (Wow, that sounded whorish... Ignore that...) And so, if I get the job *prays* I'll be the assistant manager at Hot Topic. The discount on clothes will be awesome, but what will be more awesome will be the fact that I'll be back on the schedule of a normal human so I can see my boyfriend for more than two hours every other day or so. I miss him bunches...

And the pay's not bad, either, somewhere between $9.50 and $10.00 hourly. Can't complain about that. And it sure as hell beats minimum wage! XD

So yeah, just wanted to catch people up. I'm not worried about the interview, but everyone wish me luck. I could sell ice cubes to Eskimos, so I know I'll do fine with this pitch. :)

<3!!!
~Ran-Ran

"But... can't I see her? Just for a second?" he was trying to feign innocence, but I'd know those creepy dirt-brown eyes anywhere. A card-carrying sex offender of the worst kind: a child rapist. His face had been plastered all over the papers and each new newsbyte put the entire community up-in-arms. They'd wanted to lynch him, but vigilante justice just doesn't follow through like it used to.

I shook my head sternly, my hold on my gun and my aim on him never wavering. "Miss Melody won't be signing autographs for another hour, and on top of that, shouldn't you me more than five hundred feet away from any personal contact with any minor?" She was a nine year old piano prodigy the likes of which the world had never seen. Her compositions were flawless, and every single concert she ever held would pack any venue we were in.

He looked angry all of a sudden. Viciously angry. His eyes started to change colors. Change... fucking... colors. His breathing deepened, noises akin to growls and snarls coming from his lips. My hands tremored ever so slightly, then. I'd been the big bad bodyguard up until now, but dammit...

The guy advanced a few steps, and I foolishly retreated a few more. "Look... Back off, mister! I don't get paid enough to deal with these... shenanigans!" Way to sound badass, Trevor. Miss Melody hates it when people swear, and when I let one slip, it seems like her demonically sharp ears always catch me. Getting chewed out by a nine year old like she's my grandmother doesn't do much for the ego.

As if on cue, Miss Melody emerged from the door behind me. Her sharp little blue eyes quickly assessed the situation, looking angry that I had my gun drawn, but more angry that this schlub was giving me enough shit for me to be prepared to shoot his ass. Her voice took on that strange grown-up sound it gets when she's about to take control of a situation. "Trevor, put the gun away. I'll handle this."

I nodded without question, holstering the weapon and crossing my arms over my chest, trying to continue looking tough even though this little girl was clearly running the show. She walked closer to the man... monster.. monsterman... Whatever-the-hell he was. She held her delicate, ivory pale hand up towards him, hovering level with his face.

"Relax, Mr. Greene. There is nothing to see here." She paused a moment to take the album from his elongated and claw-tipped fingers, scribbling her autograph on it with a Sharpie she always kept in her pocket. Replacing it in his hand, she gave him a simpering smile that would have had grown men bowing and scraping for her, ready to fulfill her every whim. She was frightening when she was like this, like once she grew up, in about ten years, she'd be this scorchingly hot piano diva who'd be plastered on the walls of teen boys all across the globe.

Mr. Greene was suddenly normal again, completely human, and bowing gratefully to her. "Thank you so much, Miss Melody!" he was like a kid in a candy store. His cheeks flushed and he turned and ran, likely to go home and rub a few out over what had just happened. The mere thought of that made my stomach churn. Something of it must have shown on my face because Miss Melody turned back to me, her face completely that of an innocent child once more. There was no ominous, ancient knowledge present in her eyes any longer; they were just cute, clear blue eyes.

Her blonde ringlets sprung up and down as she bounded over to me and gave me a tight hug around my waist, her tiny arms so fragile and delicate. "Thanks so much, Trevor! You always look out for me!" Her pretty blue eyes looked up at me in adoration.

I smiled down at her and lightly patted her head, careful not to muss her curls. "Come on, Miss Melody. Let's get you back inside. Intermission should be almost over now."

"Okay!" she said, laughter in her voice as she held my hand and half-led me inside, skipping merrily along as if we hadn't almost just been ripped apart by... something that wasn't wholly human. 

Hope you enjoyed it!

Well, I'm finally not working at the mall anymore. My last day was two weeks ago, and I'm now working nights at a hotel in Alex Bay. It's gotta be one of the best jobs ever because I only have to work for the first three or four hours I'm there, and then I get to mess around on my laptop with the wireless internet. The only thing that sucks about the internet there is that some nights it doesn't work so well. But then, I get to catch up on my reading, or writing, depending on my mood. 

Anita Blake #15 The Harlequin came out on June 5th!!!! And yes, I bought it. I'm sorry but there is no way in hell I'm gonna wait around for 6-8 months for the damned thing to come out in paperback so I'd only have to pay $8 for it. I shelled out the $20 and am about halfway through it. I tend to read through all of Laurell K. Hamilton's new books within two or three days after getting them, so I've been trying to drag this one out a little longer since book #6 of her Merry Gentry series doesn't come out until October... *pouts!* But, I've got enough books I've been collecting over the last few years that I haven't had time to read yet... They should be able to keep me busy until October rolls around.

And in other news of new beginnings aside from my new job, I just found out that Kelly Dillon is getting married. Fucking M-A-R-R-I-E-D. I'm happy for her and all, but it's still so WEIRD... It's just something my brain's having a hard time wrapping around, you know? I'm totally going to the wedding, too, and bringing food. But that's in a few weeks, so I'll have time to prepare my dishes for the feed.

Also, I've specifically requested off the weekend of the Ren Faire that Jenna said she wanted to go, so if you're reading this and still wanna go that weekend, count me in for sure, hun. Now I just have to get busting my ass on the costume... *sighs* 

Yeah, my regular schedule is 11pm-7 am anywhere from 4-7 days a week, depending on the week, so if people wanna do something during the day, or a night of one of my days off, call me and let me know. I haven't seen people in like two weeks, and I'm starting to go stir crazy. I read through three books in four days last week... Someone needs to help me occupy myself.

Anyways, much love all!
~Ran-Ran